Looking back did you ever see your life was as if "by dsign" and that [[THEY]] who ever [[THEY]] maybe held a key to the riddle of the why, of the past and the how of your future?
I live there, all the time as I have come to somewhat accept that my life / world / reality has been planned down to the finest details one can imagine, from the day to day stuff to the magikal reality I am so blessed to be in -- to the absolute terror and sheer horror that is the three wounds in my coccyx (tailbone) area near and affecting the horseshoe bundle of nerves that hang out there:
Pain is what I get
Love is what I give
This seems to be MY CROSS
What is yours?