IAM IN R U ??`

Day 31 of Treatment and Awakening of Lucien Faciote II

Its 5am or later I am Tired and in Pain it began on October 15, 2018 (the year blew by with Doctor appointments and home care appointments)

It is a fucken joke as how much pain can one man deal with as he slides from one Hell to another and yet refrains from Drugs or alcohol –MY --- old standbys

Nothing makes sense at all anymore

Told Dr Y that I don’t get a state change Drug / Drink (Hell anything) at the last session I had with him on-October 21, 2019

The following week (Monday) I met with DR Ginneta and she decided to “grant” me some mercy as she is so kind and full of wisdom –she saw me and raised my Suboxone 25% to 8mg / day (I thinks it is still not right where we want but DR G *she is the leader’* I` THINK 10mg is the level we are seeking (MAYBE)

MY heart beats at 32 bpm and I do NOT qualify for Cardio Help as I am schizophrenic and 2 have a fucken HOLE at my Tail Bone (Coccyx) area

Mentally I seem to need a Lady / Girl to Fuck with me Mentally – I am too old for sex games just FUCK my brains up

And IAM Happy now as I get to “Suffer for HUMANITY” this then places me in a very exclusive club (and a very lonely one too let me add) this is a place we all seek and very few ever find ‘’Heaven” on Earth – I see God / Jesus and the other deities wherever I look, it has become a thing of “MYSTIC BEAUTY”

You all are welcome (this is how I believe I got through the first year of my life being disabled and I am having a hard time with this (big time hard time)

I saw disability take my mom and at the end all that was left was “BONES”

I am NOT Going that way PLEASE

1,000 Mics of LSD into the IV and let me go (fast efficient) I do not want to be a burden

But I Have Years (a decade) and a Girl and The Mad Hatter could have a wee bit of FUN (yeah my Nurse) decided that I get to Have FUN getting the ODD items from the stores in my area (F.U.N.) I get hugs from Employees, Hand Shakes and HUGS from the stores cliental (FUN)

Fucken Rights (Key lo’) The Mad Hatter is going to have a bit of FUN

And (WHEN) YOU *allow* me a Girl / Lady (and I seem to think you my just do this for me) think of the reports and the FUN scale goes up as I have a hidden side most people don’t yet know nor understand

My fav Lady (Lady P) told me to have fun on my “trip” to – freedom (my mission statement) which I am going to share in a separate post as I think it is important to the world as it was prepared with the world in my mind

I have been thinking about all of you for a very long time now, I’ve been hanging out here and there over a long time as ((they )) granted / “allowed” me time with my mistresses (Books) and (Booze) “OK I know they didn’t plan on the 38 years of my BOOZE --- No one did – It is a seriously BAD PRODUCT

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