June 17, 2021 - Don't Fear The Reaper - BOC

It will be alright people just be kind as I learned on a 37 month adventure I needed to undergo and man did I suffer and learn for that 37 month period

Today I got called amazing by a man I respect that I know as Peter ( that ain't his real name ) but I call him that and I have no idea how it started as he befriended me as a stranger and told me tonight when I was down that I just need to focus and push ahead as I always do

I am broke as this blog / web site cost me money to pull off and I don't have a rich uncle ok I do have a few great friends but this one was on me

I didn't have the greens on Monday and I was horribly upset as I saw me losing the blog, email ( where you can send a buck or two to at lucien@madhatterexperience.com via interact ) if you can afford as I said this was on me this time and I needed to dive deep into my heart and soul and decide what I was going to sacrifice to keep this platform running as it is and has proven to be great therapy for a slightly screwed up Mad Hatter Experience of Edmonton Alberta Canada

I was told I should do like they say and roll up my sleeve and take a jab for a million dollars and I have a weirded out mental frame when I think of the jab

It might be as a result that I need a jab every 28 days and I do this for the people in the world I am allowed to be in ( but a extra ) I don't feel right in my mind as something feels odd

70% is a magic number ( I got 70% in Grade 6 and was moved to a special needs class ) so it made me smile as I remembered back that was the time my dad had his first heart attack 1972 and the stress in my family increased as mom was also unwell with something that they medical doctors couldn't figure out ( turned out to be MS ) and I began that rapid process of watching the family that I was born into slip away and I was scared and my marks at school dropped even further and then dad moved out and I quit totally being at school ( my body was there but my mind was on how to get my family back together ) this was NOT a job for a 11 year old kid ( I tried however ) as stability was important and if I was to be sacrificed for my sister my mom and dad I was into it

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