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May 3, 2022:~ Today IS My Re-Birth And I Owe A Couple Of Wonderful Ladies That Believed In Me

You know I have been down and I wanted to DIE but it was Mental Health and I have been BLESSED to Have Had A Few Great nah Incredible Psychiatrists when I went to School between ( September 4, 2013 and June 22, 2021 ) and continuing till this day but when you have a body broken along with your mind out of wake the world is a nasty as sh*t place to be stuck in

In this last few months and last week ( I was allowed to experience CARING, Kindness, Compassion, Understanding and a Growth of Self Worth ) as I lost my life as I only HURT and I was DEEP DOWN IN A VALLEY that I was NOT THINKING I was ever going to pull myself up again from

You know I didn't even think I would make it to tonight as the Physical Pain at 430am today ( I was sent to bed early, and at first I balked as it was like 730am ) and I wasn't sure I would even be able to sleep as the PAIN at 730PM last night was a NIGHTMARE

But I have been pushing HARD as I know that I can't stop as this GIG I scored in ERC / JAIL working for the MAN / GOD & Jesus Christ is nothing to take lightly as when I know I am in the LORDS Hands I know I will be OKAY as I did NOT however count on and two incredible caring ladies appearing to guide me as it seems I only need to be directed by girls as this combined with the HOLY FATHER & Jesus Christ and I am the luckiest human being on the dot of humanity and hell maybe I get to the store and grab a wee bit of foods as I have not been eating again as I lost my appetite to eat everything about 0 days ago and I have to build up my reserves ( I have been having a Cup of Coffee at the Cafe along with a Banana ) when I don't find someone in more need to the Banana than myself ( I am going to attempt to get to the bank as my card is broken again ) I think I did this consciously so I would not be tempted to get WEEDS & BOOZE and screw up my Sobriety so it is Bank and Save On at 109st and Jasper Av sometime tomorrow as I need some thing to fill my tummy again

But at this moment I need a symbol on text, email or phone to go to BED as it is that TIME NOW as 1015pm

And I also need to get a girl to get me to attempt the washing ( laundry ) again as I have been in so much pain as I hardly moved all night tonight

I am super grateful for all that YOU ON THIS SPINNING DOT have all done for me over the last 61 plus years of this life ( weird at times I am still here and not as dizzy as some )


God Bless you all

Lucien The Light II


I hurt

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